Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Marriage 101- Insight #3

Words are a powerful thing, the presence of them and the absence of them. One word can cut so deep into Jason's heart or make him feel like the person I most respect.

I've learned to be careful with this power I have. Sometimes I am a very emotional person and I am tempted to say something to make Jason feel the same way I am in that moment, or to tear him down. I don't really want him to be torn down. I want the best for him. So, in moments when I am tempted to do that (most of the time, not all) I make myself shut my mouth and give it a little while. If I think something needs to be said, I will think it through and make sure my emotions are not guiding my words. Then, I will tell Jason I need to talk to him about something that is important to me-- when is a good time for him? Then, we sit down and talk it through. This helps to avoid huge fights and hurt feelings. It always brings us closer together.

At the same time, I love that my words can make Jason feel so good. Telling him I am proud of him for something or bragging about him in front of other people always encourages him. I love that it means so much to him when I do that. I love that he trusts me with his heart and I get to see him so transparently. I don't want to take that for granted. I certainly don't want to throw away that kind of trust with some flippant misplaced words.

An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.
Proverbs 31:10-12

I want to be this kind of wife.

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